Monday, April 26, 2010

Use Me

Last year, first semester youth in Mission came to my school and I never really thought about traveling to a third-world country until I heard some of the students testimonies. I grabbed a piece of paper that said the many countries we could go to if we got involved in Youth in Mission. I began to pray about where I would go if God called me to a trip, like this.

One night I got on Myspace and just browsed around. I went to one of my longtime family friends page and I looked at this album titled, "India." I looked through the pictures and tears started coming down my face. The kids looked so beautiful and grateful. It was cool to see how much they appreciated what little they had. Months after this i went to the movie Taken and I was horrified that sex slavery was still occurring all over the world. the movie really messed with my head so I couldn't go to sleep. I got on Google and I started typing in the search window. I typed, "Sex trafficking in India." It went on to say that India was one of the top countries with women and children involved in sex trafficking.

I knew at this point this is where God was calling me. This summer I met an amazing Indian family who allowed me to come into their home and chat about my upcoming travels and I listened to them tell me about the many details of India. They also made me amazing Indian food. India is somewhere I've been incredibly passionate about and I cannot wait to be God's instrument there. Although i am excited and blessed beyond belief to get to go there, I am frightened. I just know that fear is not of the Lord and that God will protect, provide, and take care of me while I am there. Lord use me.

Wednesday, April 21, 2010

You Can Have My Heart



I can feel you tappin' on my heart strings
I'm opening the door listening for your calling
I'm captivated by the way you love me
I'm ready and alive I've never been so happy
I wont look back on who i was back then
Ill testify, declare your promises

O lord have your way
i want to take the next step
wipe clean this sinner in me
I AM ALIVE
Holy Spirit take my words
take all my selfish pride
Here I am I give my life
to Glorify You

I'm gonna change my life from the inside out
I'm following you, I want to make you proud
you know my future, and Ill trust that
You gave up your life so I will give mine back.

Monday, April 19, 2010

Preparing My Heart


I am captivated by God’s continuous love and grace. God’s calling for me has never seemed more clear. These past few weeks, months have been life-changing. On a Wednesday night I offered to play and lead a small worship service in the prayer chapel and I had no idea that this would be the beginning of a whole new me. I was hesitant about volunteering because I knew I would have to pray and this was one of my biggest fears, but I did it anyways. Then Wednesday night came and I called my parents to ask them to pray that this time would not be about me and that the Holy Spirit would fill the room, and speak through me as I prayed. My mother prayed over the phone. I went to the prayer chapel before it started and I prayed again that God would take over and that it wouldn’t be about my performance.
As I began to play the piano and sing songs I could feel the holy spirit, I prayed and I couldn’t believe what was coming out of my mouth, it was as if I was a whole new person. I threw my hands up and I knew that God had something more for me. He was telling me it was time to give him all of myself. It was time for me to take a stand, he was knocking on my door, and I answered. All my life I have wanted to be this “cool Christian” accepting those people that the “judgmental Christians” weren’t. I wanted to show them that Christianity was cool and that you didn’t have to be a boring, Jesus freak. I had such a skewed view of what a Christian is. I only wanted to show them I loved them, but by going to parties and not drinking I was nothing but a stumbling block. I realized that taking this next step with Jesus would make me the happiest I have ever been and I have never felt cooler than I do now. I want God involved in every Aspect of my life, everything that comes out of my mouth. I need people to know whom I serve. I am alive.